Goal Setting, Mind, Personal Growth

When You Can’t Hear What People Are Saying

“If you keep doing things like you’ve always done them, what you’ll get is what you’ve already got.”


Have you ever asked someone for advice? Most times you probably ask a couple of people; your closest friends or family members too. And, you will typically hear similar versions of the same sentiment of what they would do in your situation, along with an occasional departure from someone whose advice beats to a different drummer.

So there you are advice in hand, deciding what to do and lo and behold you end up doing what you wanted to do anyway or you do nothing at all. Now, what does that say to you? What it says to me is you either can’t hear, you don’t want to hear, you’re so afraid of change that you’d rather suffer with the old than bring in the new or you really don’t want to change.

Keep in mind that most of these so called changes that people are asking you advice about deal with circumstances in their lives that need to be addressed and there should be a change made. (I’m talking about people who are in very unhealthy, unhappy environments and it is not only affecting their quality of life but everyone around them as well). We aren’t discussing what kind of car they should buy or if they should order the chicken or the beef!

So why is it that people would rather be right than win? What I mean by that is that some people keep asking for advice until they hear what they want. They will rationalize why they are in the situation, they will bury their head in the sand, or they will keep walking down the same miserable path because it’s familiar and actually doing something different seems to be impossible to them.

When you would rather be right, and continue to give yourself the same advice that has brought you to this exact place in life don’t expect things to change. When you would rather be right and everyone else is wrong, then don’t ask for advice since you can’t hear it anyway.

Has it ever occurred to you that when the people that love you the most are ALL saying the same thing they actually have your best interest at heart? Did you ever think that the gnawing feeling you have inside to do something is your gut instinct knocking on your brain? And, if things were so great, you wouldn’t be asking for advice in the first place!

So, if you are in a situation that YOU know needs to be changed but you wish things were different, it’s time to wake up and either put up and shut up or do the very thing you think you can’t. Change is never easy, but what is so easy about staying in a situation that makes you feel bad all of the time? Become a winner in life by stepping onto a new path that will give you the opportunity to live a better life. Stop the self-sabotaging behaviors that got you here in the first place and learn that it’s up to you as to what direction you take your life in going forward. One of my favorite sayings is, “Advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer but wish you didn’t.”

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